The first time I went to Europe I was engaged to be married.  I was touring Italy, studying on an Art History trip and Venice was a stopping point along the way – a place to explore more museums and paintings and architecture.  Had I been prepared for the ache that would settle in my inner arena for being in the most romantic city in Europe (as I found myself without the man I loved) I might have planned for him to meet me there.  But something about the stillness of solitude before the great leap and the assurance that his unconditional love had really come into my life gave me a calm. That love was happening right then and there.  And that connection to him made everything I saw in those moments as romantic as if he had been there. The ache would have been the same. Venice gives you this longing.  It is a painter’s city.  An artist cannot help but love being in love here. From Piazza San Marco to the Rialto bridge, textures and light are all orchestrating a grand chiaroscuro that you only have to open your eyes to be a part of.  The shimmering canals and the sea fresh skies are the cymbal crashes in the song that you never want to stop listening to, but you leave knowing that you can only come back on one condition – that you come back with him next time.

Going to Venice without your fiance doesn’t break your wild romantic heart, it assures your strength in being there alone and surrounded by people other than him without being completely swallowed by the events to come and the city that is far more beautiful than you.

This trip being before the time digital cameras were introduced, photographs were counted very carefully as every frame needed to be taken with the greatest thought. Still, I wish I hadn’t been so frugal with my pictures because my memories have faded so much since then.  In this one, I remember clearly… I was thinking of him.

Last week, I had one of those miserable 48 hour summer flu things. I had plans to meet up with a friend, but instead, I spent the day inside in my pajamas, sick sick sick. When my son brought in a care package that my friend thoughtfully dropped off at my door with an oversized vogue book and samples of yummy tea, it was these vintage slides attached to her handmade card that brought me into a little adventuring mood – and far away from my sniffles. (Thanks Kristin!) Any moment brought back to the islands is a happy one.

Now all I need is a sweet stereo slide viewer to see these proper… I’ve actually had this steel lightbox on my wishlist for a ridiculous amount of months.  Though my windows usually work in a pinch to look at negatives and such, being a busy Mom during the day, I usually only have time to create at night.  (Don’t you just love that huge bakelite button on the side?)

If you have the Sundance channel, the second season of Man Shops Globe premieres tomorrow night.  As you can probably guess, I really love watching this show because it combines all my passions into one.  Each episode follows Anthropologie buyer Keith Johnson in a different country throughout the world as he visits artist’s studios, browses through markets and searches remote villages on the ultimate treasure hunt for unusual decorative objects, textiles and furnishings.  (If you haven’t seen Season 1, you can watch it on iTunes!)

While we lived in Uruguay, we met some fellow Americans who also moved there on a whim for adventure.  Having that in common was enough to become friends.  They recently moved to Thailand (!) so I’m really excited to watch the first episode that shows Keith at the galleries of Bangkok and Chiang Mai.  Our friends have been talking up the food and fun they’ve been having their with their kids (they have five) and I’m soo tempted to go visit them while they are there.  I keep seeing their updates on facebook and it just reminds me of adventures we had in South America.  Updates like: “snorkeling on phi phi island” & “getting a $5 massage and eating crab” & “car smells like humid beach towels and children feet! On a mission to find waterfall to play in!”

On second thought – maybe I shouldn’t watch episode one… We all know what happens when Jenny gets an idea…

photos from man shops globe, season two

…In Amsterdam.  My twin brother lived in the Netherlands and survived getting clipped by a fast moving train while riding on his bicycle.  He made the newspapers the following day, “Mormon Missionary Saved by Angels!” I still remember sitting in our kitchen back at home and getting the phone call (we knew something was amiss, as it’s not common for missionaries to call home.) Ben has always had a big sense of humor, so when he said he got hit by a train, I thought he was kidding me.

These past several months of our lives have been so busy.  My concept of time has shifted.  Yesterday seems like a week ago, last week feels like a months ago and a month ago feels like a year ago.  Time is slipping, churning… if it isn’t real, this manmade measurement of abstract space…(time) then how can I feel it passing in my children’s eyes so speedily?  I know that I won’t remember so much of these past several months – in the way that I find last week hard to remember.  And so I keep taking photos, greedily I take everything i want to keep into my camera-I know that someday when I get a moment to myself again, I will be able to come back to those stolen moments and make sense of it all by piecing the images together.

I’m the sort who always cherished time to herself – it’s my way of prioritizing.  I guess it’s because I can stop and see everything that I’ve been doing, in a very real sense.  So it was nice to finally sit down for a few hours tonight and organize my photos.  Going through them I ended up back to our trip to Hawaii in March.  (Yes! It feels like it was already ages ago!) So much has happened between then and now.  I haven’t had the time to sit and catch my breath or write about it, but just the act of looking at these photographs of my life showed me where I am now.  Hawaii: I remember how I packed all blue clothes. How handsome Marcus looks in island light. And how scary thrilling a giant brushfire is up close and personal.  So much more.

Pictures are a suspended reality – they are a trick.  I can suddenly remember the laughter that filled the air, the texture of baby hair, the smell of the flowers.  They are saving me from losing years in my life when I might not know them.  I still have three rolls on my bedroom windowsill waiting to be developed.  Insurance that someday soon I will know these sweet busy years even better.

I have so many photos to share from our trip that I’d love to gather some of my favorites in a small format book to remember it all by.  Time is short for me these days though.  Life goes so so fast with two busy boys. So fast.  Anyway.  Even though I forget one of my lens, left my polaroid camera (!) and my holga behind – I know, all the wrong equipment! -I do have about four or five rolls from my trusty Diana+ that I’m hoping turned out some magic for me.  In the meantime, expect some tropical vacation posts scattered throughout regular blogcasting…

While on the big Island, I faced one of my fears of the ocean head on and went….snorkeling.  dundundun! I know, so laughable. Why such a mild recreation to be frightened of? But it’s not that.  I have no problem with the mask, the swimming, that’s all relaxing. Floating on…Mmm.  And I adore the beach, living near the coast for so much of my life, it’s become an integral part of me. But the ocean itself terrifies me – it’s power and majesty moves me, scares me.  

Maybe that’s why I feel drawn to it.  

It started innocently enough really.  We had just planned to play on the beach that day, the boys and I were on the shore when I noticed Mars playfully waving his arms for all of us to come over to the cabana where we picked up our towels.  And before I knew it we were all trying on snorkel gear.

I think what “does it” for me is that understanding that no matter how aware I am, how prepared, I cannot get over the idea that suddenly underneath you an entire world will drop underneath your body with nothing between you and it -terrifying beautiful cinematic worlds inside of worlds changing and moving, threatening only in their unknown nature, their alien landscape and unpredictable navigation full of bizarre and colorful and lovely creatures all moving right beside you behind you in front of you below you. Shadows could be anything or nothing.  Coral could turn into caves or dead ends, school of fish could emerge and block traffic and you might even sound the ocean frequency through your gear with a deafening high pitch solo squeal like I did, when I found myself right above a fish as thin as a stick but almost as tall as me.  What do those kind of fish do when they meet redheads? I didn’t stay long enough to find out.

Max was very brave with me, and I was a little braver on my own… but I didn’t venture as far as Mars who saw sea turtles brush up against him. At the close of the day, I knew I adventured. I keep reviewing the half fear half thrill churn in my chest – the kind that tickles the bottom of my feet and curbs hunger and makes me want to do it all again even though I almost hated it. It reminds me of singing on stage. And I kind of want more…

Next time, my underwater camera won’t accidentally fall out of my tote on the floor of the car. (I wish I had more pictures of Mars, but we were on the other side of the shaded beach so Eli could nap when it was his turn and he way out there where my zoom lens didn’t wouldn’t reach… probably petting those sea turtles.)

Did you miss me?  I’m back after a rejuvenating spring getaway to Hawaii with my boys which couldn’t have come at a better time.  As soon as we arrived all my cares seemed to melt away into those tropical sunsets.  The light there is absolutely resplendent – an artist’s dream.  We created lots of memories: snorkeling, taking ukulele lessons from an 85 year old named Auntie, playing at the beach, driving through cowboy country, light hiking along the coast, stargazing, whale watching, gecko catching, sushi eating, park playing, chocolate coconut & macadamia nut ice cream eating, evacuating from our condo because of a big brush fire nearby, gawking through an amazing botanical garden, and much, much more… my camera didn’t miss one minute of it.  And yet, it went by all too quickly.  I forgot how vacations are like that.  And now that we are back home, it is like a breathe of fresh air has come through our lives and I feel so happy for discovering another place we adore.

The photo above is special to me because it was taken in front of the LDS Kona temple, (seen in the corner) which was whiter than white in person and the grounds were just brimming with orchids so perfect you’d think they were made of porcelain!  The only thing missing in our smooched sandwich of family faces is of course our Max, who is expertly snapping the picture with my heavy zoom lens.  Mahalo!

Happy friday from the happiest place on earth! We were here spending Christmas with my wonderful family and I’ve just got my pictures organized and developed. Looking through my pictures I realized I was having a Where’s Waldo moment trying to find my brother and his wife, who I know were standing in front of the cinderella castle in the crowd version of the same scene.  I still can’t find them…
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I was watching Emma Sunday night on Masterpiece Theatre.  It was a nice, light, visual dessert to my weekend and it had me longing for the simplicity of summertime things like arranging flowers, making reading lists, painting en plein air, even taking a turn around the room or the garden.

Winter in Seattle forces one inside and you can either be miserable and complain about the lack of light, you can book a vacation, or can get creative.  (Usually it’s a mix of all of the above.)  I’ve never really minded it too much.  Maybe because growing up here I didn’t know any different, or maybe it’s because we in the Pacific Northwest really know how to appreciate the warm season and make the best of our hibernation time.  For me, it’s this last stretch of winter right before February where I usually get a little bit itchy to feel the warm sand between my toes and the anticipation of spring starting to bloom inside of me.

So to make the shortness of days a breeze, I’m planning a trip for our family to take later in the year.  I think the paradox of choice has made me a little indecisive though, so maybe you could help us out.

Where are your favorite getaway destinations, near or far?  Family Friendly.  Maybe a little on the exotic side.  Thrill me.  GO.